Losing Alaska

An Ode To Life

suicide

  • Nobody

    I am tired. I am so tired most days I’m not even here. I’m so tired of seeing things most others do not see. Half of what I see may be real, while the other half is just paranoia. I’m so tired of not being an identity. Of not growing myself into a somebody, so Read more

  • Suicides Garden

    “Ma’am it’s time.” Looking up from clasped hands the woman rose to her feet obediently following the nurse into the next room. “Please remove all your clothes and possessions and place them into this box. That purple gown on the table is for you to put on. Once you are ready knock on the door.” Read more

  • Dissociative Identity Disorder Assignment Three

    This Assignment is about the inner turmoil of two different parts of me, and about the “elimination” of one of those parts. One In Two Two in One went out for play headed down towards the river not so far away. One of Two she did not talk, while Two of One for her footing Read more

  • Sin

    The water blows across the sea rippling and distorting my reflection of me,The summer sun sets and the winter moon rises,Hiding away sin in its millions of disguises,During all of this I just happen to see a faraway person watching over me,The far away watcher of me is broken inside,The gaping hole in her chest Read more

  • Nothing Less

    What is there to write,Nothing that would expand the expanse of the human soul,Nothing to fill that void that is devouring me and pulling me under,Nothing to quench away that gnawing hunger,Who am I? A broken hourglass missing time?A Lego missing a piece?A something?A nothing?A person without a box? I am sadness,I am sorrow,I am Read more

  • Monster

    I see him,The Monster,He is hiding in my dreams,Weaving intricate webs of my own self-hate,In my loathing I awaken for the Monster he is near,His breath full of captured souls beating upon my prepubescent consciousness,I am frightened,Too frightened to move,I pray to a God who is not listening to make it stop,Gods reply?Absent,My mind leaves Read more

  • Insanity

    Drip, drip, drop,Drip, drip, drop,Rain dripping down sploshing on the damp wet ground,Rain dripping down thudding the top of my roof as I listen,Rain dripping down tripping and trapping against the windows by which I sit,Rain dripping down urgling and gurgling in my head I can hear it,Drip, drip, drop,Drip, drip, drop,Rain pouring down slip Read more

  • False Promise

    False PromiseI am despair,I consume all and release nothing from my grasp of steel,I have slayed the greatest of men and fell the mightiest of beasts,I am despair relentless and overbearing,A thief of always,The sun does not shine here and hope is not birthed,I am despair,I promise and destroy,I end lives with the false promise Read more

  • Hope

    What is hope?A dying ember that ebbs and flows on the flame of life.What is hope?The end of me?The last touch of fingertips before a plummet to an inevitable death.What is hope?The death of me.The birth of my all-encompassing despair.What is hope?But a curse.A binder to a life I do not wish for.A chain to Read more

  • Handle-less

    My will has gone out,I am trapped in a hallway with no end or beginning,The only light is from holes,Tiny little holes on handless doors,Impenetrable doors of steel and ice and brick,Doors I will never breach,Doors of which I can peek through endless hope filled holes,Holes containing that which is sacred,Love attachment and joy,Doors I Read more