I see him,
The Monster,
He is hiding in my dreams,
Weaving intricate webs of my own self-hate,
In my loathing I awaken for the Monster he is near,
His breath full of captured souls beating upon my prepubescent consciousness,
I am frightened,
Too frightened to move,
I pray to a God who is not listening to make it stop,
Gods reply?
Absent,
My mind leaves my presence,
I think of a blackness that engulfs me,
No more crying, no more pain, no more feeling,
Gone I have become,
A numb clone of who I once was,
Drifting through life night to day,
I see the Monster he is coming,
Happy now that I died yesterday,
I smile and regretlessly begin my wade into the darkness,
To succumb to the black,
Let it swallow me whole yet again,
But for all of the times I return I am changed,
Growing darker shaded by the trip each and every day.